Compassion
Living with mental illness has made me much more compassionate and loving and I’m so thankful for that. It has changed who I am for the better. I love that I can offer support and understanding to others who are struggling with mental health. I love that I can offer hope by saying, I’ve been there and I know what you are going through. I am thankful that I know what it is like to feel hopeless, and feel like life is so monotonous and not know how I will ever get through this day. To feel like every day is a repeat of the day before and to struggle through the day with what feels like a black cloud over my head. It is a privilege to enter into pain with someone and to walk through their depression with them. To just be there and not have to say anything but to just be present.
It is so important to reach out to others with compassion. You never know how one word from you can touch someone’s life. God has placed certain people in our lives for a reason and we need to be sensitive to God’s leading so we can know how and when to minister to those around us. I can think of several people that God has placed in my life at different seasons, and how He has wanted me to reach out to them and love them and just do life with them. So often what we do is not rewarded here on earth, and so often we do not even know if we are making a difference or if we are being appreciated by the ones we reach out to. But we are still called to love those people and reach out and give of ourselves even if we never get anything in return. Sometimes I get frustrated and I feel like I give and people do not give back in return. I read a book by Nicki Koziarz and she spoke about emotional generosity and how we often do not receive from many of the people we give to. And many times we are given emotional generosity from people who we have not given to. This comforted me and gave me motivation to continue to love those around me who do not give back. This does not mean that we are called to continually give out to people who suck everything from us and who do not respect boundaries. There are definitely people who we must cut off and use wisdom when we relate to them. If we are in prayer and communing with God, then I believe He will guide us and let us know when we need to separate from them and who we need to continue to give to.
It is so nice to be appreciated and when you are, give thanks to God and point others to Him because it is Him who put that person on your heart, and Him who gives you the strength to serve them everyday. I try to remember those times and it is helpful to have an encouragement file. Keep cards or notes that people give you that have encouraged you. I was told this by a dear friend who I worked with at a crisis pregnancy centre. So often what we do is never noticed and we never see the fruit of our labours. So when we are given a glimpse into what God is doing we need to remember it and to be encouraged by it. It is also helpful to my sinful heart, not to hear praise all the time. I so often become prideful and I have to remind myself that I am nothing without God. It is all because of Him that I have accomplished what I have, and it is He who made me and continues to make me more like Him. He is so gracious and has so much patience with me. I am so thankful. All glory to Him!
I have become a different person through this illness. I pray that I have become more like Christ through it all. I know my heart was hard before and now it has been softened. Sometimes it feels like its too soft but I prefer that over hard heartedness. I am so much more emotional now and sometimes I feel that hinders me. However, I hope that people can see how much I care and how broken I am. Broken yet healed. Broken yet beautiful. I pray the same for all of you.
